Monday, April 25, 2011

A guy calls a computer store...


 You  have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and  too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully  appreciate this.  
For those of us who sometimes get  flustered by our computers, please read  on...

 

If  Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their  infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out  something like this:

COSTELLO  CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT
ABBOTT:  Super  Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO:  Thanks  I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about  buying a computer.

ABBOTT:  Mac?

COSTELLO:  No,  the name's Lou.

ABBOTT:  Your  computer?

COSTELLO:  I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT:  Mac?

COSTELLO:  I  told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT:  What  about Windows?

COSTELLO:  Why?  Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT:  Do  you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO:  I  don't know. What will I see when I look at the  windows?

ABBOTT:  Wallpaper.

COSTELLO:  Never  mind the windows. I need a computer and  software.

ABBOTT:  Software  for Windows?
COSTELLO:  No.  On the computer! I need something I can use to write  proposals,
track  expenses and run my business. What do you  have?

ABBOTT:  Office.

COSTELLO:  Yeah,  for my office. Can you recommend  anything?

ABBOTT:  I  just did.

COSTELLO:  You  just did what?

ABBOTT:  Recommend  something.

COSTELLO:  You  recommended something?

ABBOTT:  Yes.

COSTELLO:  For  my office?

ABBOTT:  Yes.

COSTELLO:  OK,  what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT:  Office.

COSTELLO:  Yes,  for my office!

ABBOTT:  I  recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO:  I  already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say  I'm sitting 
 
at  my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? 

ABBOTT:  Word.

COSTELLO:  What  word?

ABBOTT:  Word  in Office.

COSTELLO:  The  only word in office is office.

ABBOTT:  The  Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO:  Which  word in office for windows?

ABBOTT:  The  Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.
COSTELLO:  I'm  going to click your blue 'W' if you don't start with some  straight answers. 
 
What  about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track  my money with?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO:  That's  right. What do you have?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO:  I  need money to track my money?

ABBOTT:  It  comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO:  What's  bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT:  Money.

COSTELLO:  Money  comes with my computer?

ABBOTT:  Yes.  No extra charge.

COSTELLO:  I  get a bundle of money with my computer? How  much?

ABBOTT:  One  copy.

COSTELLO:  Isn't  it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT:  Microsoft  gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO:  They  can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT:  Why  not? THEY OWN IT!

(A  few days later)

ABBOTT:  Super  Duper computer store. Can I help  you?

COSTELLO:  How  do I turn my computer off?             
 ABBOTT:  Click  on 'START'... 
 

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